thoughts

So, in commenting on a friends post, I realized that the entry was becoming much too long and complicated. So, I decided to post the thoughts here instead.

Note: though I'm commenting specifically about music, I think that the defining of amateur and professional applies to all fields.


So, I just had my (possibly) last broadcast with the Orchestra at Temple Square. And, though not to the same degree, similar. The organization is weird mix of professional and amateur, very hard to explain.

For those who don't read the post, from what I understand, the basic difference between amateurs and professionals is that amateurs

create music for the pure love and enjoyment of the experience. [A] musician professionally trained in the Euro-classical tradition, where music is made to be performed and in cases to earn money, status, and/or recognition.

The OTS is comprised of musicians from all different types: free-lancer, college/university Professor, Secondary Ed teachers, retired folks, etc. This combination of grouping, all volunteer, creates an interesting dynamic. I was almost bitter for the first bit of my stint - why weren't people taking these more seriously, and well, how could we take it more seriously! This is not serious.

Then, my heart softened. I told myself I was being immature and conceited, and lo and behold, I began to learn things. (I cannot go back to amateur status [on the oboe] at this point in my life for better or for worse. I do have some hope to re-obtain that status or at least the perks, eventually, because many of the members of the orchestra are retired professionals.)

I decided that I would observe people around me. I would learn from them, and their experience even if their level of everyone's playing wasn't what I was used to. Though the music may not be technically challenging regarding fingers, there is a certain emotional challenge. And the stress of being on very public display, and how that was handled. The list could go on and on. Suffice it to say, I learned lessons that I could apply to my chosen path.

After that, things became much more enjoyable, less tedious. And, miracle of miracles, I became less critical.

It is a hard balance to achieve, that level of professionalism that is demanded of musicians(I blame recordings!) yet still to enjoy yourself because that is the way to play musically - by giving something of yourself. And if that self is bored, and tired of playing this piece, it actually doesn't come across to the audience. These bored individuals have such a true ability, that it is amazing, and lovely, and forgettable. As a good friend of mine teaches, if Finale can do it, we should be doing something more.

As I similarly intoned to my Sight-Singing students, We are musicians, not machines. There are some pretty powerful machines out there that serve a marvelous purpose. They have not, though, made the human element completely obsolete. So, let us glory in our human-ness. Though we may not be an amateur, we can learn from them, and not be afraid to show a bit of ourselves, and share what drew us to music in the first place.